Threads review, mnfringe show 9, Thy Hard - it isn’t Christmas until Hans Graber falls out the window of Nakatomi Plaza, in iambic pentameter; comedy word wizard Michael Shaeffer does it again - 5 stars (my Fringe returning favorite write-up)
OK, I’m not going to lie here. Michael Shaeffer’s latest Fringe show, Thy Hard, will probably not make a lot of sense to you if you either 1) have no previous knowledge of the 1988 Bruce Willis action/Christmas movie Die Hard (see video trailer below) and/or 2) have no previous acquaintance with anything written by William Shakespeare. You may still find it amusing, but also confusing. If you have experience with one but not the other, you should still be OK. If you’re very familiar with both, as I am, then it’s gonna be a 5-star show with a lot of laughs for you.
“It’s Cybill Shepherd’s co-star, fresh from Moonlighting.”
Even the program for Thy Hard is full of jokes. There’s an “Order of Events” section which lists the scenes for Die Hard (as broken down into the 15 character sonnets Shaeffer will be performing) arranged as if it’s a five act Shakespeare play with two to four scenes in each act. There’s also a bingo card on the back with an assortment of Shakespeare references (which Shaeffer does call out), as well as references to other Bruce Willis films, and details of Die Hard in particular. Shaeffer is accompanied on this stage journey by live voice over from Jo Kalla. Jo busts Michael’s chops a lot, particularly on his Alan Rickman impression (again, familiarity with Die Hard, and tangentially the Harry Potter film franchise, will help your amusement). Jo also warns audience members not to call out Bingo in the middle of the show. “Don’t make it weird.” Nevertheless, someone called out Bingo at my performance in the middle of a scene and Jo chided over the mic “You’re making it weird!”
“More impressive than the Wolves of Timber.”
Shaeffer, in a kilt, just for the Macbeth/McClane of it all, is fully committed to the bit the whole way through. He’s a master wordsmith and he’s having a lot of fun with this concept, using toy cars, helicopters, tiny action figures, tin foil, balloons and an enormous teddy bear to help him tell the story.
“Beethoven’s people are way litigious.”
Our story: police detective John McClane (Bruce Willis) has flown out to California to be with his estranged wife and kids for the Christmas holiday. He goes to meet up with his wife at her holiday party at work, but the skyscraper at Nakatomi Plaza (where the party is) is taken over by terrorists (led by the aforementioned Alan Rickman as Hans Gruber), so John must spring into action to save the hostages (his wife included) and save the day. There’s also a limo driver and a local cop down in the parking lot down below communicating with John in the tower and the authorities to try and help defuse the situation.
“I shall cancel every Caliban thou dost employ.”
It’s not all fun and games. Tucked inside the show is a tribute to Bruce Willis, who has been suffering from dementia for a number of years now. For Michael, this also brings to mind his grandmother, who suffered from Alzheimer’s in her later years. Part of the reason for doing this show was to draw attention to these issues, and part of the proceeds will go to charities that support research and relief for these diseases.
“When I served in ‘Nam, thou wast in diapers.”
I will admit to having a problem with pronouncing “Thy Hard” - using a hard rather than a soft TH sound, so it comes out sounding like “Thigh Hard” (which I’m sure is the porn version title somewhere on another timeline).
“I see dead people, Horatio.”
Thy Hard is silly fun, but a lot of work went into it that I have to admire. I mean, can you write a sonnet? Can you write 15 sonnets from different characters’ points of view that will all add up to the full plot of pre-existing movie you really like? ‘Cause I will freely admit that I can’t. But Michael Shaeffer can do a lot of things that I can’t do, like write poetry in general, or be relentlessly funny (or perform on stage). Really good silly things, they take time and effort to build.
“The good is oft interred with their bonuses.”
You’ll know if Thy Hard is for you just based on what it is. If you think it’s for you, you should definitely go, because for those of us who get the joke, the joke is very, very funny.
5 Stars - Very Highly Recommended
Here's some handy links to coverage of shows I've seen in the Fringe this year getting 5 and 4.5 Stars (Very Highly Recommended), 4 and 3.5 Stars (Highly Recommended) as well as the shows ranking 3 stars or less; also links to this year's Top 10 list and Top 11-20 list, also a full list of all returning favorites to this year's Fringe, plus a link to ALL the 2024 Minnesota Fringe Festival coverage.
While I have your attention, please VOTE :)
Minnesota is currently in the early voting period
for our Congressional and local primaries (I had the U.S. Senate,
Congress, and the Minneapolis school board on my ballot) - final day to
vote in the primary is Tuesday, August 13th, but you don't have to wait
until Fringe is over, go vote right now :)
Early voting for the Presidential Election itself in Minnesota starts on Friday, September 20th.
We're lucky to have a lot of time to get our voices heard, so cast your
vote, and then make sure everyone you know and love is registered and
gets to the polls to vote. Election Day, your final date to vote, is Tuesday, November 5th.
As a queer playwright and theater maker, I want a government that's compassionate and competent enough to keep us all safe and healthy, keep theaters open and running, and personally, I'd just like to be legal myself and keep the weirdos out of government and out of my personal business (and the things I post on this blog, for instance). We all have our reasons, so let's make sure we get the leaders we need and deserve, and get our friends, family and co-workers to raise their voices, too.
Find where to vote and what's on your ballot (with links to candidate websites) and other resources at the Minnesota Secretary of State's website.
For other resources on how to register, volunteer or donate, locally or nationally, check out Vote Save America.
Vote. Raise your voice. We're not going back.
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