SEVENTEETH CHALLENGE
Write something boring
that is theatrically compelling
(subject matter boring,
but tons of inherent theatricality)
Inherent
theatricality- not exciting narrative.
But nah bro, like
really boring- MORE boring than that. MORE! MOOOREE!
Instant death
People need to
experience a sense of dread four sentences in and be squirming in their seats
before the second minute has ticked over.
Then add inherent
theatricality.
What we’re doing here
is making a unique and powerful energy you can slam into the exposition or
dream sequence of any play where you need to get INFORMATION OUT
True to theme… I will
now subject you to my ...inherent ramblings.
Grumble harumph burp
So the new crop of
theater professionals aka “those damn kids” have witnessed like 1,000 hours of
stage time compared to… ??100,000?? hours of screen time- experiencing
narratives that take place between commercial breaks, exist in the service of
Marvel brawls, never had an author (reality tv), etc.
As a result- or
probably it was always so- I find that nobody knows really WHAT theater is.
They know like… where to find it if you’re looking for it. Like chocolate or
pornography we know when it’s good or bad but we’ve been rather terrible at
talking about why.
THERE IS NO BETTER
DEFINITION OF THEATER (fuck Aristotle)
The definative
definition: Theater is the
interaction that occurs when one or more living beings defy a physical, social,
or moral expectation inherent or established within a live, collective audience
(theatrical) engaged in a shared/empathetic concern (drama).
Note that I separate
dramatic concern with theatrical energy. You’ve totally been at a play where
you know the narrative arc WANTS you to care about Jack Jackson the
Jacksonville King of Jacks, but holy bejeebus you do not.
It turns out
theatrical energy thrives inside the expectation current caused by dramatic
narrative, but (like at a circus) doesn’t require it. And it can be completely
absent like when a politician tells a tear-jerker about some wronged citizen
his politics will fix.
When the two are
intertwined, you find yourself at a play.
Types of potential
theatrical energy:
Physical: unsustainable action (blowing air
into a balloon, holding one’s breath); a break in repetition (ba-dum, ching!);
acrobatic (dance, contortion, abnormalities); violence; illogical; or the
breaking from these things.
Social: bigotry; base acts (nudity, body
functions); insubordinance (familial, spiritual, or political); or breaking
from these things.
Moral: cruelty; perversion; pornography; and
blasphemy; or breaking from these things.
Example: a weatherman
talks about the temperature variations of the Mojave during the past decade one
month at a time while undressing
So to reiterate: SEVENTEENTH CHALLENGE: WRITE SOMETHING BORING
(subject matter
boring, but tons of inherent theatricality)
BONUS ASIDE
When theater was at
its most powerful, a few people wrote and read. I sometimes read things that
act like LOTS of people were reading when Shakespeare was alive (and comparably
so!) but like… not even close to a majority at his death in 1616. Words and
facts and science like we know it are not necessary ingredients for what makes
great theater.
****************
(this may accidentally be
the opposite of the challenge, since I’m not sure it’s theatrically compelling
yet, but I’m hoping the subject matter isn’t boring :)
(this is more of the
Spellbound play, following up on the scenes I posted yesterday. Sarah, wife of the love potion victim Auggie,
in the previous act had arrived at the metaphysical supply store to engage
Jeffrey in the making of the antidote.
Duncan works at the store. Jeffrey
has been flirting and Duncan against his better judgment has occasionally been
flirting back, despite the fact that Jeffrey’s love potion antics run counter
to basic good practices for wiccans and pagans.
Jeffrey got the spell out of his grandmother’s grimoire, which he
brought to the store with him to start gathering the ingredients for the
counterspell. The last ingredient wasn’t
handy at this store, but another store has a delivery on the way.
This is a work in
progress. In the previous draft there
was no such scene at the store, so the three-way dynamic here is something I’m
just getting my arms around. Didn’t get
as far into the scene as I’d like but I’m going to post what I have and keep
working)
Lights shift.
MICAH and AUGGIE fade into the dark as
SARAH, JEFFREY and DUNCAN are revealed at the
metaphysical supply store, studying grandma’s grimoire.
SARAH
While
I’m not a fan of the present situation, I have to admit your grandmother’s spell
work is impressive.
DUNCAN
The
last of the ingredients should be getting here shortly.
SARAH
We
can get started without it, then fold it into the mix when it turns up.
JEFFREY
So,
what’s the first step?
SARAH
No
offense but – actually, you know what, I take that back, I’m not really terribly
troubled by offending you at the moment so – I don’t trust you. You’re the primary reason we’re in this
mess. So I will be taking the lead on
this counterspell.
JEFFREY
Understood.
SARAH
In
order to do this quickly, though, I’m going to need help from both of you.
JEFFREY
Absolutely.
SARAH
I’m
sorry if this is going to cut into the regular course of business.
DUNCAN
Things
tend to start off slow, most days. Plus,
an in-house demonstration of magic in progress is never a bad thing.
JEFFREY
Like
free samples at the grocery store.
SARAH
Actually
no. There will be no sampling.
DUNCAN
But
it piques people’s interest in much the same way.
SARAH
Oh
goddess. The two of you aren’t - ?
DUNCAN
What? No.
JEFFREY
Not
for lack of trying.
SARAH
If
we could stay focused on the task at hand –
DUNCAH
Right. Sorry.
SARAH
If
you have to step out to deal with customers, you go right ahead. Where should we set up?
DUNCAN
Over
here should be good.
SARAH
(to JEFFREY)
Again,
I don’t trust you. So anything I have
you measure out, I’m going to doublecheck that it’s the right item, and right
amount.
JEFFREY
I
want this to go well, too.
SARAH
Good. That’ll get us to the antidote quicker.
JEFFREY
This
is really cool.
SARAH
OK,
no. Let’s establish some ground
rules. This is not cool. It’s a clusterfuck.
JEFFREY
Sorry.
SARAH
No,
you’re not, and that’s the problem.
(to DUNCAN)
I’m
assuming the reason you didn’t stop him is that you didn’t realize what he was
planning to do?
DUNCAN
No. Sorry.
SARAH
But
since he came back and admitted it - ?
DUNCAN
I’ve
been trying to impart basic principles.
SARAH
Great. So I’ll just stick to the specifics of now.
(to JEFFREY)
You
were working alone?
JEFFREY
What? Yeah.
It’s not a terrorist sleeper cell, I was just goofing around.
SARAH
See,
things like that make me want to slap you.
Or turn you into a newt.
JEFFREY
You
can do that?
DUNCAN
It
was a Monty Python reference.
JEFFREY
Oh.
SARAH
You
dosed my husband with a love potion in connection with his very best friend in
the world. My husband has a past history
of not having the best impulse control where his penis is concerned. And he is currently writing a song for the man
he thinks he’s in love with. So things
are not great, things are not cool, and that’s on you. But you don’t seem terribly contrite and that
bothers me on a whole host of levels.
(to be continued)
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